Welcome to the Be.Side Project, an exploration of where the end of life and Judaism intersect.
In this episode I speak with Dan Fendel a death doula, a spiritual care volunteer, and an active member of the Jewish community teaching about jewish end of life practices and making conversations about dying approachable.
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Dan Fendel is the co-founder of the Chevrah Kadisha at Temple Sinai, he has been a Spiritual Care Volunteer at Kaiser Hospital in Oakland since 2014, and is a leader of the Melaveh project.
Dan is also a Board member for Kavod v’Nichum, a North American organization providing resources, education, and training along the Jewish end-of-life continuum, and a faculty member and Acting Dean of Kavod v’Nichum’s online educational program, the Gamliel Institute. He has also co-authored several books.
Resources:
The Melaveh Project and the article I stumbled into about the project
We Remember Them by Sylvan Kamens and Rabbi Jack Riemer
The poem Dan references
Chesed Shel Emet: The Truest Act of Kindness, Exploring the Meaning of Taharah by Rabbi Stuart Kelman and Dan Fendel
Hebrew and Jewish references explained:
Bikur Cholim: Hebrew for “visiting the sick”
Nechama: Hebrew for comfort, a nechama group might be a group of people providing comfort to community members
Chevra Kadisha: Aramaic in origin is the term for Jewish burial societies, also translated as “holy friends” or “sacred society”
Melaveh: Hebrew for “one who accompanies”
Shiva minyan: Shiva is hebrew for “seven” and is the week-long period of mourning after a burial. A minyan is the term for a group of 10 Jewish adults who gather to pray. As certain prayers can only be said in a quorum of 10, the minyan is brought to the mourners.
Elohai neshama shenatati bi tahorah hi: From the morning prayers. It translates to “My God, the soul you have given me is pure”. You can read where it comes from in the context of the text here and also there’s a beautiful reflection on the text from My Jewish Learning.
Dan Fendel